mast jokes

Posts : 25 Join date : 2009-02-04

all mast jokes here..let me start with 1

The Election season is going to kick off in the country soon ......
some quick lines in this scenario ........

Naa do mujhe koi pehchaan
mujhe sirf insaan rehane do
majhab ki jaroorat hogi tumko
mujhe bedaag rehane ho

khuda ke bando ko ab
nahee koi aur naam chaahiye
har shakhs ko jeene ke liye
sirf sukoon chaahiye
majhab ko mera ab
apna maumla rehane do

Posts : 23 Join date : 2009-02-04

CA versus MBA
)

7 MBA and 7 CA's are going from PUNE to Mumbai.

So both groups gather at Pune Station. Both groups are desperately trying to prove their superiority.

SCENE 1 (PUNE - MUMBAI):

7 MBA take only 1 Ticket and 7 CA's buy all 7 tickets
CA's are desperately waiting for TC to come......

When TC arrives,

All 7 MBA get in one toilet SO when TC knocks, one hand comes out with the ticket and the TC goes away....
CA's say "Dekh lenge"

NOW on return Journey all of them don't get a direct Train to PUNE.
So they all decide to take a Passenger till Lonavala, From there they can easily get a LOCAL to PUNE

SCENE 2 (MUMBAI - LONAVALA):

CA's decided, "this time we will prove that we too are Equally SHAANE"....All 7 CA's take 1 Ticket

MBA don't buy ticket at all!!!!!..TC arrives....
ALL CA's IN ONE TOILET.ALL MBA IN THE OPPOSITE ONE..
One MBA gets out and knocks the door of CA's toilet,
One hand comes with the tickets, he takes the ticket and comes in MBA Bathroom...

TC DRIVES out ALL the CA's from the toilet and they are heavily fined........
tai tai fissssssss..

SCENE 3 ( LONAVALA -PUNE) :

SO now both the group on LONAVALA station. CA's
planning their move for last chance.. they board the local to PUNE .

This time CA's decide that they will play the same (1 ticket) trick.
ALL CA's take 1 tickets...MBA BUY all 7 tickets this time...

SO TC Comes.. All MBA show their tickets.....
CA's are still searching for toilet in the LOCAL...........

Moral of the Story : An MBA is any day smarter than a CA

Posts : 23 Join date : 2009-02-04

After having failed his exam in “Logistics and Organization”, a student goes and confronts his lecturer about it.

Student, “Sir, do you really understand anything about the subject?”

Professor, “Surely I must. Otherwise I would not be a professor!”

Student, “Great, well then I would like to ask you a question. If you can give me the correct answer, I will accept my mark as is and go. If you however do not know the answer, I want you give me an 'A' for the exam.”

Professor, “Okay, it's a deal. So what is the question?”

Student: “What is legal, but not logical, logical, but not legal, and neither logical, nor legal?”

Even after some long and hard consideration, the professor cannot give the student an answer, and therefore changes his exam mark into an 'A', as agreed.

Afterwards, the professor calls on his best student and asks him the same question.

He immediately answers, “Sir, you are 63 years old and married to a 35 year old woman, which is legal, but not logical. Your wife has a 25 year old lover, which is logical, but not legal. The fact that you have given your wife's lover an 'A', although he really should have failed, is neither legal, nor logical.”

Posts : 22 Join date : 2009-02-07

Pappu Ne Jalte Hue Makan Se 6 Logo Ko Apni Jaan Pe Khelkar Bahar Nikala
Fir Bhi Usko Jail Ho Gayi
Qun...
.
Qun..Ki Vo Sab Firebrigade Wale The

Posts : 27 Join date : 2009-02-07

Santa ki ladai apne baap se ho gayi
To usne apne baap ki photo kabristan me 1 ped pe latka diya
Aur Niche Likha
"COMING SOON"

Posts : 11 Join date : 2009-02-07

Bin Laden's son was studing in an American school.
Teacher asked him, " I have 4 apples, how can I share it among 5 children"

He answerd, "KILL ONE"

Posts : 11 Join date : 2009-02-07

Waiter gives bill to Santa
Santa: "Take my card."
Waiter: "But sir, this is Ration Card."
Santa: "So what? U have writen outside
"ALL CARDS ACCEPTED"...

Posts : 20 Join date : 2009-02-04

Waiter gives bill to Santa
Santa: "Take my card."
Waiter: "But sir, this is Ration Card."
Santa: "So what? U have writen outside
"ALL CARDS ACCEPTED"...

Posts : 20 Join date : 2009-02-04

In a train, ticket checker to a saint: Ticket please!
Saint: I don't have.
TT: Where do you want to go?
Saint: Lord Ram's birth place, Ayodhya!
TT: Come, lets go!
Saint: Where?
TT: Lord Krishna'a birth place, Jail.

Posts : 27 Join date : 2009-02-07

In a train, ticket checker to a saint: Ticket please!
Saint: I don't have.
TT: Where do you want to go?
Saint: Lord Ram's birth place, Ayodhya!
TT: Come, lets go!
Saint: Where?
TT: Lord Krishna'a birth place, Jail.

Posts : 21 Join date : 2009-01-31

In a train, ticket checker to a saint: Ticket please!
Saint: I don't have.
TT: Where do you want to go?
Saint: Lord Ram's birth place, Ayodhya!
TT: Come, lets go!
Saint: Where?
TT: Lord Krishna'a birth place, Jail.

Posts : 21 Join date : 2009-01-31

Gal: Do u have any sentimental love cards?
Shopkeeper: How about this card, it says 'To the only boy I ever loved'
Gal: Great! I want 10 of them